Finding my way.....

This morning I decided to ride to work, I actually got out of bed earlier enough just made myself get up and get moving..... it looked such a beautiful morning no wind the sun shining brightly or nearly brightly I mean it was early..... Had my usual breakfast of porridge got dressed and set off..... ask my lovely hubby to drive in, in about an hour and drop off the car with the lunch I had prepared. One of the girls from head office was coming down to help me get ready for the next tax season..... and I had made some lovely healthy soup for lunch.

Set off well over the hill, mind you it was bloody cold and the goose bumps were like mountains on my arms and legs, but I thought it can only get better as that sun gets stronger.... down the other side and what lay ahead of me well you may ask... it was a thick dense fog.. just hanging low on the road in my path... what to do, I decided I had my lights on it will be fine... So off Ihead going those this pea soup of fog heading for work. It was cold and damp but just kept going and going..... it really started me to think that this is how I have been feeling of late just lost in a fog.... but I could see through it eventually I just have to keep going and keep trying to find my way...

As you know I do wear glasses and you all know what happens in fog your windscreen needs some warmth to keep it clear... this isn't so easy on a bike, my glasses started to cause me some concern I couldn't see I had to struggle to look over my glasses and under my visor on the helmet.... oh well a new problem... must try and get some glasses with window wipers or a heater so eventually there was nothing for it I had to pull over and take my glasses off. I can't see well at the best of times without them but there was not choice I had to keep going I had to get to work and I had to ride there.... I wasn't going to take the easy option of ringing home and asking for help. I must do this and there was no other option or excuse this is something I have to do for me I must pull myself out of the down feeling I have been having of late... of feeling lost and alone.

Traveling along is good for the soul you tend to think and wonder about things I find its the best time for me to plan my day but to think about everything, life, work, kids, family, me, my journeys and what I need to do... It is good to get out there, I live in such a beautiful place such a beautiful valley. The hills this morning were awesome they stuck out above the fog and when I pushed myself to get up them I could see the air i breathed out... like smoke from a dragon, but I got up them and kept going. I suppose what I am saying is that I must keep going I will get through this like I got through that fog this morning... I made it to work it took me a little longer than usual but I got there...

My dear hubby was upset when he arrived to take my bike home in the ute..... he got very frightened I suppose when he saw what I had ridden through to get to work, he told me its not worth it, its too dangerous you could have been hit by a car. I know it probably wasn't sensible but I felt confident and when cars do come along I am very particular about making sure I keep to the side....I am going to keep riding as much as I can I just love my riding its part of me now and that isn't going to change....

This is my life now.... being healthy and strong, throwing myself completely in what I do, its time for me this is my time ........ don't get me wrong my family is so important to me.... but I just have to make some time for me to be me...

Tomorrow my boy comes home from camp and I just can't wait... I have missed him so much we are indeed blessed.....

My birthday on Sunday bring on another year.....